COMMENTARY: Somebody needs to tell Google to shut up.

UPDATE 8/6/11 9:07AM
And the sentiment continues.  Brian Hall has written a very poignant analysis of his concerns with Google and why Google’s supposed outcry is facetious & disingenuous.
http://brianshall.com/content/google-are-pussies

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UPDATE 8/5/11 1:25AM
Apparently, I’m not the only one that thinks Google is whining pathetically.  ConceivablyTech has gone so far as to called Google’s David Drummond, the Chief Whining Officer.
http://www.conceivablytech.com/8699/business/google-designates-a-chief-whining-officer

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imageHave you ever seen someone on the losing end of an beating just keep jawing & talkin’ and digging themselves an even bigger hole – and all you can think of is, “Dude.  Somebody needs to tell him to shut up already.  It’s just getting sad now.”

Recently, Google whined about how the industry, Microsoft in particular, was according to them at least, ganging up on them by collectively buying a set of influential patents from Nortel and leaving Google out in the cold, vulnerable to litigation associated with the purchased intellectual property… then going off on a rant about how the patent system was evil & all that.

Microsoft fired back by producing an actual email where it specifically asked Google to join in on the purchase to ensure equal protection across all companies from patent litigation involving the purchased Nortel intellectual property… AND GOOGLE DECLINED.

ANNNNNNND GOOGLE RESPONDS
Y’know, Google had to be really embarrassed by being called out.  Sure enough though, they mustered enough gall to try to paint themselves as being ‘victims’ as described by Tom Warren in his post:  http://www.winrumors.com/google-fires-back-at-microsoft-in-public-android-patent-spat/

The key comment in Google Chief Law Officer David Drummond’s reply  (also known as wordsmithing, misdirection, or just plain ol’ lawyer B.S.) is in this line:

A joint acquisition of the Novell patents that gave all parties a license would have eliminated any protection these patents could offer to Android against attacks from Microsoft and its bidding partners.

(Underlining is mine.)

THIS IS AGAIN – OBVIOUSLY FALSE.
There’s two notable things you can derive from this puppet speak:

  1. If Google, Apple, Microsoft and any other parties own the patents – they all share in the intellectual property use equally and negate the possibility of each using the patents against each other.  It negates the threat of patent litigation amongst the bidding partners.  This is the precise reason Google was invited to participate in the first place… TO CREATE A DÉTENTE
  2. Interestingly… or maybe even laughingly, Google appears to be admitting that they are infringing on patents – because otherwise why would they need them to defend Android OEMs?

SO WAIT:  WHY WOULD GOOGLE NOT WANT TO PARTICIPATE?
The answer is simple:  Google can’t profit from this.  This Twitter conversation between journalists/authors Mary Jo Foley & Paul Thurrott was just too awesome not to write up:

  • @DaQuantumFro: @edbott @maryjofoley @thurrott Having read the update to Google’s post, isn’t licensing what MSFT would’ve use the patents for
  • @maryjofoley: @DaQuantumFro @edbott @thurrott  I don’t know what to think any more. I don’t understand Google’s argument here, I admit
  • @thurrott: @maryjofoley It’s, we don’t want to pay. And we don’t understand why can’t just run roughshod over this industry without MS getting in way.
  • @maryjofoley: @thurrott  Yes… good cliffnotes version
  • @thurrott: @maryjofoley You have to think they really expected people to applaud them for this.
  • @thurrott: @maryjofoley That and, “we would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for those dang laws.”
  • @maryjofoley: @thurrott  Funny thing is they are the ones who initiated the whole “patent attack” thing. So they brought attention to themselves on this

Then, Frank Shaw, Microsoft’s Corporate Communications lead responded on Twitter with this volley to explain Google’s likely motivations once and for all:

  • @fxshaw: Hello again David Drummond. This is going to take a few tweets, so here we go. Let’s look at what Google does not dispute in their reply.
  • @fxshaw: We offered Google the opportunity to bid with us to buy the Novell patents; they said no.
  • @fxshaw: Why? BECAUSE they wanted to buy something that they could use to assert against someone else.
  • @fxshaw: SO partnering with others & reducing patent liability across industry is not something they wanted to help do

Seriously, Google.  Walk away.  This is getting sad.

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