Coach Quotes

My father sent me these.  Man, this is good stuff.  I don’t know how many of these are real but they sure are funny.

image #1.  ‘After you retire, there’s only one big event left… and I ain’t ready for that.’ Bobby Bowden / Florida State

#2.  ‘The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely to be the one who dropped it.’ Lou Holtz /Arkansas

#3.  ‘There’s nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you.’ Woody Hayes / Ohio State

#4.  ‘I don’t expect to win enough games to be put on NCAA probation.  I just want to win enough to warrant an investigation’ Bob Devaney / Nebraska

#5.  ‘It’s kind of hard to rally around a math class.’ Bear Bryant / Alabama

#6.  ‘I make my practices real hard because if a player is a quitter, I want him to quit in practice, not in a game.’ Bear Bryant / Alabama

#7.  ‘I never graduated from Iowa, but I was only there for two terms – Truman’s and Eisenhower’s.’ Alex Karras / Iowa

#8.  ‘My advice to defensive players:  Take the shortest route to the ball and arrive in a bad humor.’ Bowden Wyatt / Tennessee

#9.  ‘I could have been a Rhodes Scholar, except for my grades.’ Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State

#10.  ‘Always remember… Goliath was a 40 point favorite over David.’ Shug Jordan / Auburn

#11.  ‘I asked Darrell Royal, the coach of the Texas Longhorns, why he didn’t recruit me and he said:  ‘Well, Walt, we took a look at you and you weren’t any good.’ Walt Garrison / Oklahoma State

#12.  ‘Son, you’ve got a good engine, but your hands aren’t on the steering wheel.’ Bobby Bowden / Florida State

#13.  ‘Football is not a contact sport – it is a collision sport.  Dancing is a contact sport.’ Duffy Daugherty /Michigan State

#14.  After USC lost 51-0 to Notre Dame, his postgame message to his team:  ‘All those who need showers, take them.’ John McKay / USC

#15.  ‘If lessons are learned in defeat, our team is getting a great education.’ Murray Warmath /Minnesota

#16.  ‘The only qualifications for a lineman are to be big and dumb.  To be a back, you only have to be dumb.’ ‘Knute Rockne / Notre Dame

#17.  ‘It isn’t necessary to see a good tackle.  You can hear it.’ Knute Rockne / Notre Dame

#18. ‘We didn’t tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking.’ Wilson Matthews / Little Rock Central High School

#19.  ‘I’ve found that prayers work best when you have big players.’ Knute Rockne / Notre Dame 

#20.  ‘Gentlemen, it is better to have died as a small boy than to fumble this football.’ John Heisman  AUBURN

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